OneLens Plays ‘Where’s the Trail” on Petit Piton

Written by sp174604

(As sung to the tune of MXC’s “Don’t. Get. Eliminated!” High-five to all those that understand the early 2000’s poor TV reference) …

OneLens plays a game of “Where’s. The. Trail!” And if you’ve followed my blog before, you’ll recognize the ethos of “Solo travel means I’m adventurous, not an idiot!” On a few spots (mainly while straddle/walking up two boulders with a 12 foot crevasse between my legs, hanging onto a weathered rope tied to a tree-branch with nothing behind my back but 700 meters down to the Caribbean Sea, I might have began to question its’ validity.

Let us start with the payoff, and work our way backwards down the sheer slopes of Petit Piton.

Let's start with the panoramic payoff of a steep, two hour, 800 meter climb up Petit Piton. All pictures in post taken with my kit lens (Canon 18-55mm) on my Canon T3i. October 2013. Handheld, stitched together in Photoshop. Had about 40% overlap on each picture (nine total) to compose the image. Gros Piton is seen behind the foliage in the left-center area of the frame, and Soufriere Bay is camera right. Petit's summit is maybe 30 meters in circumference, with dense pockets of bushes and brambles and rocks and abso-frickin'-lutely stunning 360-degree views on St. Lucia.
Let’s start with the panoramic payoff of a steep, two hour, 800 meter climb up Petit Piton. All pictures in post taken with my kit lens (Canon 18-55mm) on my Canon T3i. October 2013. Handheld, stitched together in Photoshop. Had about 40% overlap on each picture (nine total) to compose the image. Gros Piton is seen behind the foliage in the left-center area of the frame, and Soufriere Bay is camera right. Petit’s summit is maybe 30 meters in circumference, with dense pockets of bushes and brambles and rocks and abso-frickin’-lutely stunning 360-degree views on St. Lucia.

A UNESCO World Heritage Site, I CAN NOT safely, or in clear conscious recommend this hike to anyone not in good physical health (you don’t have to be a diehard CrossF*t fan or able to squat a bear or run ultramarathons, but being able to run three miles, or have any resemblance of upper body strength, or have sturdy ankles from jumping rope, or at the very least, some mental resilience, is a HUGE PLUS. A patience guide (Demascus!!! Insert smilely-face emoticon here) with both first aid and rock climbing experience helps too!

One of the more well-groomed paths upward. (Pause). Now before you quickly jump to a "that-looks-fine" thought, notice in the lower left corner is my New Balance cross trainer. Poundsign#FrameOfReferenceForSomethingGoingStraightDown.
One of the more well-groomed paths upward. (Pause). Now before you quickly jump to a “that-looks-fine” thought, notice in the lower left corner is my New Balance cross trainer. Poundsign#FrameOfReferenceForSomethingGoingStraightDown.

Helpful hint #2 (yes, this is a disjointed list. Point one was probably listed three or four posts ago) Bring a water bottle. Or three. Bring a granola bar and some munchies. Enough to share with your guide. To be eaten during your 30 minutes of rest at the summit. Your guide has earned this small token of thanks after successfully not losing you off the sheer face of the side of the mountain. (Note to those afraid of heights–you’re not going to do well on the parts of the “trail” that are narrower than half-a-doorframe)

Can't see the trail? Join the club. I got from the bottom boulder in the center of the frame to the vantage point of where the picture was taken using the cable-thick vine as a rope upward.
Can’t see the trail? Join the club. I got from the bottom boulder in the center of the frame to the vantage point of where the picture was taken using the cable-thick vine as a rope upward.
At least one of the more defined paths. For extra credit, make like a local and attempt 60% of the hike with both hands looped through the straps of your backpack. For extra extra credit do it in khakis and a polo because "you like to look professional." Yes, Demascus was a certified ROCKSTAR. Again, emphasis on hiring a kick*ss guide.
At least one of the more defined paths. For extra credit, make like a local and attempt 60% of the hike with both hands looped through the straps of your backpack. For extra extra credit do it in khakis and a polo because “you like to look professional.” Yes, Demascus was a certified ROCKSTAR. Again, emphasis on hiring a kick*ss guide.
Ok, photo-confession, I HATE the color correction on this one. Not happy with the whites wayyyy over-exposed throughout the frame. Must have been too busy worrying about my footing, or scraped knees, or mentally converting my years-old indoor rock climbing skills to this unfamiliar outdoor terrain.
Ok, photo-confession, I HATE the color correction on this one. Not happy with the whites wayyyy over-exposed throughout the frame. Must have been too busy worrying about my footing, or scraped knees, or mentally converting my years-old indoor rock climbing skills to this unfamiliar outdoor terrain.

Ok, Final point on my Petit Piton climb. If I had a dollar for every St. Lucian who commented “Oh no, you mean Gros Piton!” after I stated that I had climbed Petit Piton, I could have paid for my cab ride to the airport! (Slight over exaggeration, but attention-grabbing since I’m trying to make a point). Follow-up statement: No, No, I in fact, do mean Petit (insert pointing gesture here, with vigorous head-nodding and a confirmation that, yes, it WAS HARD). St. Lucian follow-up statement: I’ve lived here my whole life and never climbed Petit. You’re brave.

Jalousie (Sugar) beach would fall in the near-ground, with Soufriere Bay taking center stage. La Haut Plantation and resort in one of the rooftops nestled on the hillside directly across from the lens.
Jalousie (Sugar) beach would fall in the near-ground, with Soufriere Bay taking center stage. La Haut Plantation and resort in one of the rooftops nestled on the hillside directly across from the lens.